Tuesday, April 06, 2004

Why is it so hard to just tell the truth (about "marriage by faith")?

Defenders of UBF "marriage by faith" are apparently proud of the practice, citing as possible benefits of "marriage by faith": the "low divorce rate" and the avoidance of morally "problematic" dating. But they seem to be loathe to admit the one great problem with "marriage by faith," that it amounts to leader-arranged marriage:

Author: Joe
Subject: Why is it so hard to just tell the truth?
In reply to: Chris 's message, "Re: A Priestly Nation" on 14:08:36 04/02/04 Fri

>For instance, you [Brian K. of Toledo UBF] answer the question
>"Are UBF marriages arranged?" with: "No, I am not aware of any
>marriage in UBF that has been arranged."

Why is it so difficult for UBF members to just tell the plain truth about the "marriage by faith" practice? If they are so proud of the practice, and think it has so much to offer, then why do they so boldy lie about that slightly important detail that a "marriage by faith" is a leader-arranged marriage? When you do not choose the person you will marry, when you are not even allowed to choose the person you will marry, that is an arranged marriage, whether it happens in UBF, in other destructive groups, or in certain cultures.

In certain cultures in which arranged marriage is still practiced, you risk the wrath of your parents, alienation from them and even the opportunity to marry if you reject their choice for your marriage partner. In the same way, in UBF, you risk the wrath of your "spiritual parents," (i.e. your "shepherds," your leaders, "God's servants") and alienation from them, and you risk forfeiting the opportunity to marry, if you reject their choice for your marriage partner.

If UBF members want to defend their beliefs and their group's teachings, they ought to at least tell the whole truth about what UBF teaches and practices.


By the way, the divorce rate among UBF marriages "by faith" is low if you use the cynical argument of "marriage by faith" defenders, that if a UBF marriage ends in divorce, it was never a marriage "by faith" to begin with.