Instead of just writing a static personal story about my time in the University Bible Fellowship (UBF), I've decided to start this blog. I don't want to write something and forget about it. New thoughts about UBF and life in other abusive and dysfunctional environments seem to come almost everyday. I do this in the hope of helping some people understand my strong objections to the teachings and practices of UBF. These people hope that time will heal all wounds inflicted by the UBF system. "Why apologize? Why admit wrong-doing? Sufficient time will erase painful memories and solve everything." I will argue that it is just this kind of attitude in UBF that prevents them and UBF from changing for the better. Time will not heal all wounds.
I also see this as a way to burn my bridges.
Update (12/10/06): This blog can also be seen as a method of trying to process the what's and why's of that mostly traumatic period of my life when it was dominated by UBF under the leadership of Sam Lee. It can seen as sort of "self therapy." It has helped me to think critically about and understand my traumatic experiences and others' traumatic experiences in UBF. The restoration of critical thinking and maintaining critical thinking is one of the most important areas of cult recovery and recovery from any abusive situation. When we can think critically of our experience, comparing it to experiences in other abusive groups, understanding the common characteristics and dynamics found in all highly-controlling groups, we are far better off than we were when all we had was relief, anger and confusion after having left the abusive group.
